But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
