honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
oh yeah. preciate
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.