i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
