What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
