You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
