You're so nebulous sometimes
home. puking in laundry basket.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
