Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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