gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
