Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
