so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
