You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
