Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He felt like a one man threesome
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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