ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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