spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Randomize
