did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
