Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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