Moan for me like Helen Keller
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Randomize