remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
