Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
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