this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
It's rum buckets o'clock
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
