her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
