Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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