what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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