did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
