dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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