You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize