I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
