Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
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