He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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