A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
