hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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