He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
