kristin has been a bad kristin
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
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I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
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Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize