FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
