Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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