Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
