Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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