I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
