So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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