I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize