worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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