it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
