So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
