Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize