Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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