38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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