i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
