Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
