I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
