god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
