my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Life is so much better after having sex.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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